Lone Female Read online

  Derek went on, in his smarmy voice trying to sound like everybody's best mate. 'This is Carl Sanders, he's our admin man. He's the one who keeps us all going while we're out the front selling hard.' We all laughed, though I'm not sure at what, and I had a chance to look at Mandy properly.

  She was only about 19 or 20 I guessed, and on the short side but breathtakingly pretty and I realised why Derek was oiling all over her. She looked like someone had taken a leggy model but then squashed her down a bit, so that she still looked beautiful but everything was a little shorter and wider. She had dark glossy hair in a sort of bob, a clear complexion and bright blue eyes above a little upturned nose and a red cupid's bow mouth. She was wearing some kind of little dark polka dot dress which clung to her perfectly, showing off a full chest which I guessed was held down with some sort of minimiser bra, a narrow waist and a round, bubbly arse and legs which were perfectly shaped but just a little too short. I don't notice women's clothes much but everything went well on her, even the little blue and cream shoes she had on.

  'Pleased to meet you.' She was smiling at me but her voice was trembling a bit and I realised she was probably a little intimidated, and Derek's hand on her shoulder probably didn't help. She held out her hand and I took it, realising I was staring. She held my gaze a little longer as well, until Derek pulled up a chair and pressed her down into it. I noticed with pleasure that she leant forward to get out of his grasp.

  'This will be your desk, Mandy,' said Derek, as he swept away a load of papers I'd been collating on the desk next to me, 'so I'll leave Carl to show you the ropes. But remember my door is always open. Come and see me anytime, as we'll start you on the real sales work soon.'

  I noticed a stress on 'real' and realised Derek was doing his best to put me down in front of her without actually saying anything. Just then Dean, one of the other sales staff, stuck his head round the door and said 'Customer, Derek, we've got nobody else on the floor out here.' Derek chuckled and said 'duty calls' then left, straightening his greasy tie and putting his shiny jacket on.

  I started showing Mandy how we processed invoices, dealt with enquiries and other boring stuff but the time passed quickly as we hit it off instantly, chatting and joking until Derek came back and dragged her off for some 'sales training', his eyes fixed firmly on her cleavage.

  3.

  The next night I was out again, this time in a posh wine bar in an office and retail development on the other side of the county. I used to vary the routes I worked on. I knew if I just stuck to one place I'd get found out eventually. At the same time I had to know the route well, where the best places to pull them over without being seen were, and so on, so it couldn't just be any old road. I had three carefully planned routes which I used at random so I never kept to a recognisable pattern. Even if someone got suspicious and took my number plate, I was prepared with the false number plates I mentioned earlier. Those were a doddle to make; mocked up on the computer then printed out life-size and laminated with just a bit of blu-tac to keep them in place. I'd even used a kind of reflective paper that looked right in headlights.

  As for what number I used - well, that was the bit I was most proud of. I'd driven to a few large cities and gone past the police station, finally finding one with a car the same make and colour as mine. It's easy to spot an unmarked police car once you know the signs. Then I just took the number down and that was it. So if anybody, even a copper, took my number, all they'd get would be the details of a police car from another city. Of course, I could just have driven round the streets until I found a car the same make and model as mine and used that number - but I didn't like the idea of some poor innocent sod getting into trouble because of me. I'm all heart like that.

  It was a quiet night with few customers and as I sat in the corner with my orange juice and paper, I started thinking back on how I got into all this. I'd always been keen on uniforms and the police, even since I can remember. I used to love watching 'The Bill' and other police programmes and I even tried to join the force years ago when I left school, but I'd already got a couple of minor convictions under my belt by then and there was no way they'd take me. I also tried joining the army at one stage, thinking I might get into the military police, but they wouldn't take me and the Territorial Army didn't want to know either.

  It might sound odd but I'd always fancied myself as a bit of an actor as well. I was in school plays and stuff like that, and I got a kick out of putting on a costume and becoming a different person. I even thought about going to drama school, but my old man soon talked me out of that; said actors were a stuck up lot who spent most of their time out of work and I should knuckle down and get a proper job. That's when I went into sales and have been there ever since; well, until arsehole Derek had tried his best to turn me into a glorified office boy.

  The IPO stuff had started as a joke, really. It wasn't like I woke up one morning and said to myself 'I'm going to pretend to be a copper today.' Actually it started because of acting. As I said, I'd given up the idea of being an actor, but I still wanted to keep my hand in, so to speak, so I'd signed up with an extras agency. It was easy work because you didn't need to be members of Equity, the actors' union, to get non-speaking parts. Stuff like standing around in the background in a pub pretending to be having a drink or whatever.

  There was quite a lot of work going if you were prepared to stand around in the cold doing bugger all for most of the day, the only problem was I could only do weekends and evenings so hardly ever got offered anything. Then a few months ago, when I'd pretty much forgotten about it, I got a call out of the blue from the agency asking if I was free that weekend for location filming in a place on the edge of London. They wanted me to play a copper. The odd thing was, the agent said, laughing, that I'd been picked because I looked like one.

  It was for some new series that they're bringing out quite soon; sounded a load of rubbish, the usual moody stuff about some forensic scientist who's always getting one over the police and who also happens to be drop dead gorgeous. Anyway, I was supposed to be one of a group of coppers searching some waste land for a body. So I turned up at some abandoned industrial estate with all the usual chaos of lights, catering vans, caravans and stuff that you get on location filming, with a jumped up prick of a director queening it over everybody.

  Me and a group of other men were put in a draughty portakabin and given police uniforms to put on, with helmet, fluorescent jacket, all the bits and pieces. A sexy little wardrobe girl put it on and consulted some sort of file showing where everything went. I can't quite explain it but once I had that uniform on I felt a different person. I felt I had authority. It sounds stupid I know, because let's face it who cares what a copper says these days, it's not like the fifties when everybody rolled over backwards to do what the local PC told them, but whatever it was, as I looked in the mirror, I definitely felt different. The wardrobe girl giggle as she looked at me.

  'Ooh, I wouldn't want to meet you up a dark alley. Oh, you look nasty. You were so sweet before!'

  I laughed and looked at myself in the mirror. She was right; the helmet came down a bit over my eyes and the stab vest, jacket and equipment belt bulked me out; I'm no short arse at 6' 1" but I've never been really big. It looked like I'd put on a few pounds though. The wardrobe girl called over her colleague, some mincing bloke who was bent as a nine bob note but a good sort. He looked me up and down.

  'Well hello stranger, what happened to the innocent civilian we had in here?'

  I laughed. 'It's called acting, darling.'

  Camp boy laughed again and poked me in the ribs. 'Well you can arrest me anytime, love!'

  When everyone was finally ready, me and the rest of the keystone cops went to pile into a van that was going to drive out onto some wasteland near the studios. Only there wasn't enough room in the van, so I volunteered to follow on in my car. The driver told me to hurry up because the director was getting shirty and we were over schedule already. By the time I'd got to
my car and got back they'd left, and so I drove off in the direction I thought they'd gone in. After a while though I realised I was lost, driving around an abandoned industrial wasteland on the edge of a rough London suburb.

  To cap it all I didn't have my mobile and even if I had I didn't know who I should have phoned or what to put in the GPS. It was pretty late by now and eventually I arrived at the end of a closed up shopping street, deciding I'd have to ask directions from someone, if anybody was about at all. I got out of the car, leaving my helmet off as the bloody thing felt like wearing a brick, and walked in the direction of the street. I could hear thudding bass music from somewhere nearby and then saw down at the end of the road a big group of people swarming round a nightclub.

  There are some parts of Britain round pub closing time on a Saturday night that are like a war zone. Pissed people staggering around and fights breaking out while a few coppers try to contain the chaos. This place wasn't that bad, as far as I could see, but there was still an air of menace about it, with sounds of shouting and laughter that could easily have turned into something nasty.

  I didn't want to go any further on, especially dressed the way I was. I started to wonder anyway if I should be wandering around dressed in a police uniform; some of that lot down the road looked like they might be the types who would enjoy cornering a copper on his own and kicking the shit out of him. So I turned back to the car, deciding I would just drive back to the studios; I'd probably missed my scene by now anyway.

  I was about fifty metres from my car when I spotted the two girls, striding along the road arm in arm and laughing. I thought they'd called out to me so I walked on a bit faster, but then they crossed over and shouted at me.

  'Oy oy, ' ello 'ello 'ello!' Then they both started laughing again.

  I heard one of them call out, in a cockney accent.

  'On your own love? That's a shame!'

  Before I could get to my car they'd caught up with me and were walking beside me, giggling. I looked at them. They were both about 25, not bad looking, but common as muck with heavy makeup; one was a bit short and dumpy, not fat though; with dyed blonde hair and big tits almost spilling out of a tight top; the other was slim and dark with harsh features and a flat chest but good legs, wearing hotpants and knee high boots. They were a bit merry but not blind drunk or anything. I decided to humour them.

  'Come on now girls. Behave yourselves,' I said, and carried on walking.

  They cracked up laughing again when they heard my accent. The blonde said 'Oo arrr, country boy are you? Come down to the big city on your tractor?'

  I walked on faster and turned briefly to them. 'Come on, fun's over. Time to go home to bed.'

  'Yes please!' said the dumpy one, 'as long as you come with us.' Hotpants started laughing and grabbed my belt.

  'Can I have a look at your truncheon?' They both started giggling again and we tussled a bit as I stepped back to avoid them, about to tell them to stop messing about and that I was just an actor who'd got lost. Then I suddenly thought: how far can I push this?

  To be honest, I was starting to enjoy it and thought it might be worth a try. I'd never had two women at the same time before. I'd come close, but in my experience girls like this like to talk the talk and act the ladette, but when it comes down to it they chicken out. I didn't have to think for long though, because blondie stepped in front of me, blocking my way, with her hands on her hips, and thrust her chest forward.

  'Aren't you going to fuck me, then?'

  I stopped and looked her up and down. 'What, just you or both of you?'

  'Well I'm not just gonna stand and watch, am I?' said Hotpants, aggressively.

  I looked around quickly. The street was deserted and my car was only a few metres away, tucked out of sight with no streetlights. Nobody was about and with my pulse racing, I took the plunge. I nodded my head in the direction of my car and said quickly, 'Come on then.'

  Giggling, the girls piled into the back seat of the car. Blondie looked around and frowned. 'This ain't a police car. Where's your big blue light?'

  I slid in next to them and closed the door.

  'No it's not a police car, it's mine. I'm off duty and I'm going home.'

  Hotpants looked annoyed. 'Well come on then, get in the front and drive us there.'

  I suddenly realised it was nearly 100 miles back home and anyway, I was supposed to be working.

  'Look, I haven't got time to mess about,' I said. 'Here's good enough.'

  Hotpants still wasn't happy but Blondie wasn't going to wait.

  'Fuck's sake, Karen, stop moaning' she said.

  At the same time she reached up and pulled her little top off and wriggled out of her leggings. She had some kind of push up bra on and skimpy knickers; I felt my cock immediately go hard as she smiled, reached behind her back and started to unclip her bra.

  She had massive tits, a bit low slung though from the weight and with a bit of a flabby waist, and an arse just short of being fat. She closed her eyes and breathed heavily as I groped her chest, making the nipples stand up, while she fumbled to unzip my trousers. I took my stab vest off but kept my shirt on and leaned back as she got my cock out and began squeezing and working it up and down. I looked over to Hotpants who was staring at the proceedings and starting to look bored. I sensed she was going to be the one that chickened out.

  'Aren't you going to put on a bit of a show then, girls, or do I have to do all the work?' I looked meaningfully at Hotpants.

  'Alright, alright, hang on a bit, Jade,' said Hotpants, taking her top off.

  She wasn't wearing a bra and had almost non-existent breasts with dark nipples, but they looked good on her slim frame. They kissed and fondled each other a bit in front of me, more for effect than anything I thought, but I wasn't complaining. I got Blondie - Jade's - knickers down and slid a finger in to her moist pussy, using my other hand to open up Karen's hotpants, hooking my finger through her skimpy thong.

  I smiled as I saw she was totally shaved. I started fingering both of them and they groaned, kissing each other harder. Then Jade broke off and knelt down in the seatwell, taking my cock in her mouth and sucking hard while I continued to finger Karen. I thought she was the reluctant one but she seemed to warm up; after a few seconds she got down on her knees as well, jostling with Jade to take turns sucking my cock. I was hard as steel now and not sure how much more of this I could take, so I hooked my hands under Karen's armpits and lifted her up, moving my knees aside. Jade took the hint and leaned back, wiping her mouth and watching while I lifted Karen bodily onto my lap, turning her to face away from me towards Jade. I heard her gasp and Jade whispering.

  'Oh yeah, fuck that looks good...'

  Karen smelt of booze and fags and a bodily scent that was driving me wild; she wriggled about a bit but then Jade leant forward and took my cock again, slurping at it greedily and wanking it hard over Karen's clit. Then I was inside her, savouring the tight grip of her pussy around my shaft and loving the feel of her slim, taut body in front of me.

  I gripped her round the waist and worked her body up and down my cock, looking at her tight, boyish arse flexing as it bounced. She rubbed her clit furiously and gasped while Jade stroked my balls, occasionally leaning forward in the cramped seatwell to lick my balls and the root of my cock as it pounded in and out of Karen, touching herself at the same time. I was concentrating hard now and adjusted Karen's body on my lap so that I wouldn't get too much sensation on my cock; it was a relief when I felt her body stiffen and her back arch into me. She gasped out, exhaling heavily as she came.

  'Ohh FUCK.' Then she fell back towards me, breathing hard.

  There was a brief respite as she clambered off me.

  'Fucking hell, that was good,' she said, taking my face in her hands and kissing me hard. She broke away and pushed me back into the seat cushions as Jade got up, with a greedy expression on her face, her big tits dangling in front of her.

  'I hope you've got some left for me,'
she said, smiling and reaching down to pump my cock.

  I lifted her up onto the seat and got behind her as she crouched on all fours facing Karen. I took her hair in my hand and gripped it, then entered her swiftly from behind, enjoying the different, looser feel of her pussy compared to Karen's, sopping wet with expectation. I gave her arse a big slap and watched it wobble slightly as I thrust into her; she was leaning forward now over Karen. Her big tits were swinging rhythmically as I gave her a good pounding, with Karen reaching forward occasionally to grope and tweak them. I knew I couldn't last much longer and thankfully didn't have to wait; because Karen started rubbing Jade's clit.

  Within less than a minute Jade grunted loudly and gasped. 'Shit, I'm going to come.'

  I pounded her relentlessly and saw Karen grin as Jade orgasmed, her body rippling back into mine. Quickly I pulled out and said 'turn around' to Jade. She leant back against the door next to Karen and they both leant forward as I wanked over them, as they opened their mouths and reached up to grope my cock and balls. The pressure finally broke and I exploded, a stream of hot cum landing on Karen's tongue and the rest spattering over Jade's tits as she pushed them up to rub my shaft. Then I fell back, breathing heavily.